One Year Free

A poem based on personal reflections a few days ago about an ex and the time that's passed in between I guess. Its one of those poems where an idea and words sort of take control and just exit my mind without me asking. I suddenly realize that there are words on the paper and I take the raw mental product and form it into something more understandable for others. One of my longer poems, and the writing style is a bit different than I'm used to.

One year clean

My heart no longer needs you in order to beat

There was a day I thought you were it

The one I’d finally settle down with

I think that’s the part I hate the most

I nearly let my independence become a ghost

I love how now I can’t remember your middle name

I forgot your birthday and have gone on to be sane

I threw away the remembrances of you

Even the salt and pepper shakers I promised to hold on to

All these were signs I’d broken free

From the iron chains of love you placed over me

One year sober

Deep down, I was relieved it was over

I went cold turkey and survived the pain

Forgetting you was like a passing cloud, a three month rain

I rediscovered someone else better

With whom it didn’t work, I couldn’t get her

You found yourself a lover before we ended

It pushed me over the edge, my anger vented

And yeah, you wouldn’t admit it and be true

But you were done with me, and I was sick of you

I’d rather be single forever, chasing my dreams

Than to still be with you, getting stitched into seams

“One year free”

I think to myself retrospectively

365 days have gone by

Since the two of us broke our ties

We called it quits in the coffee shop

You wore a different necklace, not the one I got

That heart shaped trinket I gave you under a golden arch

Where I had my panic attack and sobbed out my heart

I drove to Kansas City to pick you up

After waiting an entire summer with a chest sewn shut

We gave it a shot, but I’m glad its this way

Because my soul would have died, tied down one more day